Slide

Sometimes I think I should start a blog concerned with nothing beyond the movie Fight Club and the philosophies and thoughts contained within it. I would never argue that it is the best movie ever made, but I have learned more from it than from any other film. If you have not yet noticed, many of the posts in this blog reference or explicitly quote the film in one way or another. This post is no different. Bear with me.

One of my favorite scenes from the film is known as Human Sacrifice. Before we go any further, please click the link and watch the scene. Thanks. Now we can continue. While Tyler Durden's thought process is questionable and his results are debatable, perhaps the most important part of this scene is a voiceover the Narrator (Edward Norton) gives in passing as the two men leave the convenience store: "No fear, no distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide."

I cited that statement over social media earlier this year and was quickly presented with this (likely rhetorical) question: "How do you do that?" Simple question, but certainly relevant. I do think there is something to find, otherwise I wouldn't look. That said, here we go.

A Quiet Desperation

Sometimes it is necessary to be honest with oneself. If I am going to take "γνῶθι σεαυτόν" seriously then I have to be willing to look myself in the eye and say what needs to be said, to explore things that it would be convenient to ignore. I like to think that I am a fairly self-aware individual, a person who doesn't shy away from reality for the sake of convenience.

Deep down, beneath all my pretentions and hangups, I really just want to be wanted.

It isn't a matter of loneliness or community. I have friends, family, brothers and people to talk to and lean on. Sometimes those categories blur, sometimes they do not. I can walk into a room and see individuals both glad and annoyed that I am there. This is natural, I think, part of most people's life experience. I wouldn't trade the reality of who I am and the existence I lead for anything.

Art and Artists: Freelance Whales

In keeping with my belief that anything I have to say has already been said better than I could ever say it, I will let the Freelance Whales introduce themselves to you.

"To call them multi-instrumentalists might be a little overdone. The kids in Freelance Whales are really just collectors, at heart. They don’t really fancy buffalo nickels or Victorian furniture, but over the past two years, they’ve been collecting instruments, ghost stories, and dream-logs. Somehow, from this strange compost heap of little sounds and quiet thoughts, songs started to rise up like steam from the ground."

There Is Always Hope

“We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.”
- Chuck Palahniuk

“Remember, Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.”
- Andy Dufresne

“Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don't give up.”
- Anne Lamott

Silly Advertising

Sometimes I like to see what kind of advertisements Google is placing in this space, just for kicks. Obviously, the advertisements are generally geared toward the content, making use of key words to assign "relevant" ads. At one point, I posted a series of explorations concerning my disillusionment and frustrations with the church as it exists today. Google responded by placing ads for churches and other religious organizations. Today, I hopped onto the front page of the blog to see what ads Google decided to send my way. What did I find? An ad for a new book demonizing the "ruling class", complete with a forward by Rush Limbaugh. I guess the algorithm missed the part where I expressed my misgivings with the Republican party and politicians in general. Either way, I got a good chuckle out of it.

And so on...

Politics, Politicians and Me

The time has come once again for election projection/coverage/news to dominate the television channels I watch, the newspapers I read and the conversations I overhear. Elections are tomorrow. Fantastic. Suffice it to say that I do not consider this to be the most wonderful time of the year.

Disclaimer: if this seems disjointed at times, I apologize. I've been working on this post off and on for a while; hopefully it doesn't show.

My frustration with and general dislike of our political system is well documented (if you know me well, that is). I consider politicians to be sleazy salesmen of a product that does nothing but dig a deeper hole than we already find ourselves living in. The irony is that my frustration towards the system (as a whole) and its participants (by and large) leads members of either "wing" (some of whom I am aware read this blog, and to them no offense is aimed) to believe that I am a lackey for the other end of the political spectrum. No joke: some of my more conservative-Christian-right wing-Republican friends/acquaintances believe that I am a crazy liberal, while many of my liberal-Democrat-left wing-Bush hating friends label me as a hopeless right winger. This fact makes me laugh to no end. Oh, lest I forget, some of my Libertarian buddies find me far too big government for their tastes (more on that later). Regardless of who you ask, the same point resonates: rhetorictocrats (copyright to Xander) of every political persuasion view me as too far one way or the other to fit with their party...and fortuitously enough, I agree. Let's dive a little deeper.

Selling Myself

9/20/2010
Oh, the joys of hunting for jobs. I have my first interview of this year later today, and I am both excited about it and dreading it equally. This would normally lead to a discussion of "the game" and how much I hate playing it, but I don't have time for that. Instead, this is more of a study on anxiety.

The reason I hate selling myself in this way is because I never feel genuine with the claims I have to make. For example, I know I'll never be the best for any position, but I also know I have as good an ability to learn and succeed as anyone. But selling myself requires that I convince the interviewer/boss/whoever that I am far and away more prepared and qualified than anyone and everyone else. When this is blatantly untrue, I don't exactly enjoy trying to sell that fact.