Thursday, December 30, 2010

TTS: Tucker Carlson

Before I get much further, I want to point out something: I don't hate Tucker Carlson. Far from it. The man is probably quite personable, someone I might enjoy getting a beer with. Or not. Regardless, Tucker Carlson - the news commentator, the pundit - sucks. He just sucks. The way I look at if I want to remain friends with someone is very simple: do they bring something to the table - as in energy or conversation or positivity or something - or do they take something away, by being negative or classless or what have you. Tucker Carlson, while not a friend (by any means), brings nothing to the table. Instead, he takes a whole bunch off the table. A whole bunch. In short, Tucker Carlson sucks.

Should I provide examples? Yeah, I guess so...due diligence and all. Without further ado, I present:

Things Tucker Carlson Is

1. An idiot. I absolutely cannot believe this story exists...except for the fact that Tucker Carlson is involved. Enough said. What set me off most about this story? Tucker saying this: "I'm a Christian, I've made mistakes myself, I believe fervently in second chances"...and then he suggested that Michael Vick should have been executed for his crimes. What an arrogant fool.

2. Still an idiot. And Jon Stewart is awesome. Try to convince me otherwise. Or, as an alternative, watch this and be convinced that Jon Stewart is better than Tucker. Or at least that he sucks less.

Tucker, I have one request. In the words of Jon Stewart, "please stop". Please. Just stop. You bring nothing to the table, you make absurd (and potentially racist) comments for no apparent reason, and no one likes you. Alright, I concede that your mother does. But that is the only concession I'm willing to make. Spoiler Alert: a mere three weeks later, Crossfire was canceled by CNN. Poetic justice indeed.

On a related note, who employs Tucker since being fired by CNN? I'll give you one guess. That's right...Fox News. Does this surprise anyone anymore? Because it certainly doesn't surprise me. I guess we will have to put up with TC coming on right before Sarah Palin and right after Newt and Karl Rove. "Fair and Balanced"...what a joke. But let's not get off topic too much...let me get back to my original point.

Tucker Carlson, you suck.

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