Chick-fil-Ugh

As usual, when something controversial happens, I can't help but speak my mind. Clearly I haven't learned how to keep quiet around controversy yet. And while I have plenty to say, I want to preface everything you're about to read with two facts. First, I am a Christian, by which I mean I am a Christ-follower. Second, I believe that marriage between two men or two women should be legal and fully vested with the privileges granted to heterosexual marriage by the federal government. I also think Chick-fil-A is delicious, for what it's worth.

Like many of you, I've been watching the news and listening to the dialogue concerning Chick-fil-A president and COO Dan Cathy's views on gay marriage. If no one else is going to say it, I will: this is getting out of control. In the end, your religious views or your stance on the legality of gay marriage or your thoughts on chicken are irrelevant to me. Believe what you choose to believe. To each his own, and so on. Nonetheless, I struggle to understand many of the things being shouted across the vast expanse that lies between the two sides of this issue, and it gives me an insatiable desire to rant. I hope you don't mind.

The Epitome of Bachmann

I know, Michelle, I don't get it either.

Earlier this week, world class rhetorictocrat Michelle Bachmann added to her long list of unachievable promises, baseless statements and shows of ignorance that have littered her campaign thus far. While speaking at a campaign stop in South Carolina on Tuesday, she made a promise to the crowd in attendence: "Under President Bachmann you will see gasoline come down below $2 a gallon again. That will happen." On the surface, that sounds great. According to AAA, the current national average for regular gasoline sits at $3.57 per gallon, while diesel fuel is running at $3.88 per gallon. Assuming that she was referring to regular gas, Ms. Bachmann is promising to reduce fuel prices by 44% in order to get gasoline back to late 2008/early 2009 prices.

If you're anything like me, stepping up to the fuel pump and having to brace for paying $50 or more for a tank of gas is not something you look forward to. If I were the type of person who took promises at face value and trusted that politicians would deliver, Ms. Bachmann's promise to cut gas prices nearly in half would be music to my ears. Unfortunately, that's precisely the opposite of how I do things.

Victims in Name Only

Once again, Stewart came through in the clutch. Before I go on, I'd ask that you watch the clip I've embedded below.

The Daily Show - GOP - Special Victims Unit
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I'm not sayin'...I'm just sayin'.

You see, a big piece of why I'm so sick of the political atmosphere in this country has to do with the seemingly constant stream of individuals and groups playing the victim card. Honestly, it's like a giant playground where everybody is still in pre-school. But where I come from, nobody likes a tattle tale. I mean, I never would have guessed that people would want to play the victim card. It just doesn't seem to be beneficial.

Whenever I watch the news, I hear about terrible things happening in the world which I as an American am not affected by. Genocide, religious intolerance, racism - these are things I do not have to encounter in my day to day because of the life I was born into. Yet almost constantly I hear rich, powerful, usually white politicians and commentators claiming to be victims simply because someone called them a name or misrepresented their beliefs. It all seems quite over the top to me. I guess what I'm saying is this: conservatives aren't victims; children growing up in war-torn Iraq are. American Christians aren't victims; those giving their lives to living their faith in China are. Sarah Palin isn't a victim; those affected by the tragedy in Norway are. Al Gore isn't a victim, but everyone who had to sit through An Inconvenient Truth is.

Okay, while that last one might be a bit of a stretch, the larger point still stands. It seems like it has become not only acceptable but fashionable to claim victimization in our nation's current political environment. I don't care what your politics are, it happens on both sides of the spectrum. Nancy Pelosi does it, Sheila Jackson-Lee does it, Allen West does it, Fox News does it, and so on. And every time I hear it, it makes me cringe.

I don't expect the victim-claims to go away anytime soon, and I don't expect anyone to ever admit that their rhetoric might have gone a little overboard. That's the America we live in now. But I guess I keep coming back to the fact that even while it seems that our politicians do whatever they can to rub me the wrong way, there is always hope that tomorrow things might start to get better. Will they? Probably not. But I'll always hold onto that hope.

And so on...

Why Jon Stewart Wins At TV

Remember a few posts ago when I called out Tucker Carlson and others for using war metaphor? If you don't, feel free to catch up. No worries. Maybe you instead remember some of the many times I have called out politicians or religious figures for using hateful or derogatory rhetoric about the people they disagree with (here, here, or here, among other examples). Either way, I'm sure I have made clear my distaste for Glenn Beck, Pat Robertson, MSNBC and all the rest of the rhetorictocrats (copyright to Xander) which have taken over our televisions, radio stations and news outlets. Partisan hackery should have no place in today's politics, and as such I distance myself from Sarah Palin, the Tea Party, Nancy Pelosi, Michael Moore and all the rest who partake in such foolishness.

Because I reject the ideologies of both political parties (and therefore virtually all of cable news), I find myself being drawn toward whatever voice of reason I am able to find...like I've said before, I am all about moderation - the middle ground. What else to I enjoy? Comedy. What would be awesome? Combining the two.

Rep. Jim Moran: Seriously?

He looks angry, doesn't he? Anyway, we all know that politicians are prone to say stupid things from time to time. Rinse and repeat, so to speak. Foot-in-mouth is in their nature, and it seems like there is no fixing it. In this edition of Seriously?, I'll introduce you to Representative Jim Moran of Virginia. Mr. Moran is a Democrat, and as such is prone to say stupid things about conservatives, much like Tucker Carlson, Glenn Beck and others are prone to do toward the left.

Per Fox News (here), Rep. Moran, in an interview following the State of the Union Address, "blam[ed] his party's losses last November in large part on voters who 'don't want to be governed by an African-American.'" He then compared the current political climate to the one which existed just prior to the Civil War. Wait, seriously?

Gov. Robert Bentley: Seriously?

Apologies for following up one post with another similar post, but the newly elected governor of Alabama leaves me no choice.

If the governor wants to get into theology, perhaps he should recognize that God is the father of all - Christian or not. To use the prodigal son example, we are all God's children; many have simply strayed from the Father. Non-belief in Jesus doesn't change who your father is...it just prevents you from being an active part of the family.

Regardless of theology, politicians (of both sides) need to stop using inflammatory rhetoric with such regularity. There is no reason for Gov. Bentley take a shot at non-Christians in the way he did; how can an athiest or Muslim or whomever expect him to govern fairly and without bias if he views Christians as better than non-Christians? How do we know that view won't seep over into his policymaking, in a way such that non-Christians are deprived of rights or attacked by his government? You might say that I'm simply looking at this situation as a slippery slope, and that none of this is worth worrying about. The problem is, such a me-versus-them mentality has permeated both our churches and our political offices, and division never brings reconciliation. It only brings suffering. And correct me if I am wrong, but we have had enough suffering lately for quite a while.

And so on...

So, About Tucker

Lest anyone think I was too hard on poor Mr. Carlson (or not hard enough) in my last submission, I want to follow up with a bit of clarification and expansion of what I previously wrote. Don't worry, I'm not going back on anything I said before. Rather, I want to make sure it is clear where I am coming from.

Recently I have been rereading one of my favorite books, Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. Seemingly every day that I read it, something jumps out at me worth writing about and commenting on in this space. But that would be annoying and you know it, so I refrain. You can thank me later.

TTS: Tucker Carlson

Before I get much further, I want to point out something: I don't hate Tucker Carlson. Far from it. The man is probably quite personable, someone I might enjoy getting a beer with. Or not. Regardless, Tucker Carlson - the news commentator, the pundit - sucks. He just sucks. The way I look at if I want to remain friends with someone is very simple: do they bring something to the table - as in energy or conversation or positivity or something - or do they take something away, by being negative or classless or what have you. Tucker Carlson, while not a friend (by any means), brings nothing to the table. Instead, he takes a whole bunch off the table. A whole bunch. In short, Tucker Carlson sucks.

Should I provide examples? Yeah, I guess so...due diligence and all. Without further ado, I present:

Things Tucker Carlson Is

Silly Advertising

Sometimes I like to see what kind of advertisements Google is placing in this space, just for kicks. Obviously, the advertisements are generally geared toward the content, making use of key words to assign "relevant" ads. At one point, I posted a series of explorations concerning my disillusionment and frustrations with the church as it exists today. Google responded by placing ads for churches and other religious organizations. Today, I hopped onto the front page of the blog to see what ads Google decided to send my way. What did I find? An ad for a new book demonizing the "ruling class", complete with a forward by Rush Limbaugh. I guess the algorithm missed the part where I expressed my misgivings with the Republican party and politicians in general. Either way, I got a good chuckle out of it.

And so on...

Politics, Politicians and Me

The time has come once again for election projection/coverage/news to dominate the television channels I watch, the newspapers I read and the conversations I overhear. Elections are tomorrow. Fantastic. Suffice it to say that I do not consider this to be the most wonderful time of the year.

Disclaimer: if this seems disjointed at times, I apologize. I've been working on this post off and on for a while; hopefully it doesn't show.

My frustration with and general dislike of our political system is well documented (if you know me well, that is). I consider politicians to be sleazy salesmen of a product that does nothing but dig a deeper hole than we already find ourselves living in. The irony is that my frustration towards the system (as a whole) and its participants (by and large) leads members of either "wing" (some of whom I am aware read this blog, and to them no offense is aimed) to believe that I am a lackey for the other end of the political spectrum. No joke: some of my more conservative-Christian-right wing-Republican friends/acquaintances believe that I am a crazy liberal, while many of my liberal-Democrat-left wing-Bush hating friends label me as a hopeless right winger. This fact makes me laugh to no end. Oh, lest I forget, some of my Libertarian buddies find me far too big government for their tastes (more on that later). Regardless of who you ask, the same point resonates: rhetorictocrats (copyright to Xander) of every political persuasion view me as too far one way or the other to fit with their party...and fortuitously enough, I agree. Let's dive a little deeper.

Making Money Off Jesus

One of my pet peeves is the existence of the Christian bookstore. Family Christian Stores, Berean Christian Stores, etc. It bothers me that these places exist and are as prevalent as Hallmark or Barnes and Noble. Why do Christian bookstores bother me so much? They bother me because their primary reason for existence is to make money off Jesus.

The first I remember feeling such frustration with a Christian bookstore was the summer after my freshman year of college. My mother had asked me to pick up a book or cd or something for her from the store, so I swung by Family Christian after I got off work that day. Walking up to the store, I noticed a rack of shirts on sale outside the store. Upon closer inspection, I noticed that the shirts all had a common theme: patriotic, God loves America themed shirts, complete with a matching Bible verse. Similar to this one. The message? America is better, and God loves us more. Oh, the theology.

According to Berean’s website, they stock over 170,000 products. Pardon my generality, but that is a ton of products, all targeted at the Christian community. All created in order to make a profit. A profit off the name of Jesus. Oh, the almighty dollar.

As a student and supporter of the free market, I understand that when a market exists untapped, someone will come along and fill that market segment. The Christian community is a huge segment of the market, and inevitably someone will begin to create products with the hopes that Christians will buy them. This is simple business, a fact that exists in every segment and within every community. But do Christians have to participate so willingly?

Let me step back once again and attempt full disclosure. Yes, I own Christian books and music. Some of my favorite authors are sold within Christian bookstores, such as Don Miller, Brennan Manning and others. Just yesterday I purchased four “Christian” books off the internet, and while two of them were authored by atheists, they were published by Christian publishers with the aim of selling them to Christians. Like me. And I bought them. Amazon is my friend.

I attempt full disclosure because I don’t want it to sound like I am condemning all Christian authors or Christian books. Not at all. Just parts of that culture. Like I said, I understand the need for the market to fill the Christian segment. If there is demand, supply will follow. Yet, I wish that people weren’t so eager and willing to make money off of Jesus.

It seems that within conversations like this, I always come back to a line from Saul Williams' poem The Sermon on the Mount of the Inevitable Progression from Saul to Saul; if you sense a bit of deja vu, it may be because I have cited this poem and line in a previous post. The poem reads: "how many tables and laptops and Cadillacs and pews and pulpits would be overturned in THIS day", and I wonder if Christian bookstores might be added to that list. When Jesus overturned the moneychangers' tables in the temple, it was (in part) because they were seeking to make a profit off God by charging Jews more than they should have been for temple money or sacrificial animals. Are Christian bookstores so different? Would Jesus walk into Berean and be pleased, or would he overturn tables? I wonder if his reaction would entail more of the latter than the former, and I wonder if anyone realizes it. (Certainly some do...check out this article for a unique perspective on the issue of making money off Jesus).

Thus, I have two requests. Not to anyone in particular; perhaps to those indefinable "powers that be". These are relatively minor; I would certainly not ask that these stores close and stop doing business.

First, stop making money off of The Good Message. If the goal of a Christian bookstore is to save souls rather than make money, why are Bibles sold? Why are they not given away instead? I can understand if an author must charge money for a book in order to make a living and be a self-sufficient member of society. But Bibles? Something tells me the authors of that book aren’t interested in profit making. I have an inkling that Jesus might not be a fan of his words being sold rather than given away freely. Leather bound, gold engraved and diamond encrusted (I jest) Bibles don't exactly fit with a message of love for the poor, broken and marginalized.

My second request is that Christian bookstores stop selling political texts and apparel. It bothers me when Christian authors write with the intention of being political or something similar. Example: you can find in any Christian bookstore a copy of How Would Jesus Vote?, a book attempting to convince you of how Jesus would vote on a number of contemporary issues. Don't even get me started on this one. Thing is, I don’t remember Jesus being very political. I remember Jesus avoiding politics completely and just focusing on people. When asked about his opinion of Caesar and paying Roman taxes, Jesus said "give to Caesar what is Caesar's, and to God what is God's" (Matt 22:15-22); doesn't sound as if Jesus was very concerned with politics. But maybe that's just me. Amazingly, you can even find books by Sarah Palin, Laura Bush and even Michael Savage (title of his book: Liberalism is a Mental Disorder...you have got to be kidding me) in many "Christian" bookstores. Yes, those are links within the Christian bookstores' websites where you can buy them. Christian bookstores: stop combining Jesus with politics. And making money off the combination. I do not appreciate it.

Oh, one more thing. Please put away the America-is-a-Christian-nation-and-better-than-everyone-else shirts. I love my country as much as anyone, but to make it sound like we are more moral or religious than the rest of the world is sickening. As if Jesus loves us more because we are American. Oh, the humanity. Are we so quick to forget that Jesus was Jewish?

And so on…